Desoto Jones

Before I even really get into this review, I just need to let everyone out there in Scene Point Blank-land know that this album actually contains the lyric "You are speed bump in everyone's life." Not only is this line in the chorus which makes it repeated a few times, it's also the opening track under the same name. Speed bump; are you kidding me? Well I have feeling Aurora is going to be a pothole in my music listening life. Desoto Jones you may make me curse and worry about my non-existent car's axel, but will be all but forgotten by next turn.

The one-sheet that Deep Elm included with Aurora mentioned something about if this was the last thing that Deep Elm ever put out they would die a happy indie record label. Well good for you. If I put Aurora it would be my last release also since I would have realized I've lost my last shred of musical integrity after releasing this glossy doe-eyed Pro-Tools produced piece of schlock onto unexpecting ears.

If Desoto Jones isn't rewriting all of Jimmy Eat World's hits, they are trying master when Dashboard Confessional decided to plug in their guitars and rock out. Aurora is such a generic piece of emo-pop trash that I don't know who besides their five fans at the local community college's coffee shop would be into this. I suppose I could go check out Desoto Jones's Myspace and take a look at their fans, but why bother; we know the type - shy lonely slightly chubby girls that dress primarily in black and live on Livejournal.

I don't even know why I'm even bother listening to Aurora. I've heard Desoto Jones way too many times in my thirty-three years of existence on this planet. They are just another band that wants to be huge by writing songs that mirror what's popular with the "kids" these days. Last year this band was probably sporting size 44 JNCO jeans, braided their hair all weird, played their guitars as close to the ground as possible praying for an opening slot on Ozzfest.

Deep Elm, maybe it is time to wrap it up. Seriously how many more "speed bumps" does one have to go through? Aurora is so by the numbers I expected the CD to come with a small watercolor paint set. I can do nothing but sit here shake my head in disgust. I hope no one comes over and catches me listening to this.

2.0 / 10 — Jason