Reviews The Gossip Undead in NYC

The Gossip

Undead in NYC

Let's face it people, America is fat. They're also lazy. The two don't go together to form a very healthy society. I mean, look around you right now. Seriously, do it. What do you see? I'll tell you. Fat people. And not just any fat people, lazy fat people. These lazy fat people are trying to lose weight by cutting out vegetables and other forms of carbohydrates out of their diet. Did you hear me? They're trying to lose weight by only eating fat. What the fuck? Go outside and fucking exercise, or only eat cereal or something. It's a bad deal America, but will we ever change? The answer is no. And The Gossip proves that.

Sure, they know how to play their guitars fast, and their drums loud, but the important thing is that you must look good to play rock and roll, and The Gossip does not. Sure they may have one skinny white guy in their band, but the two fat chicks outweigh that, literally. This Searcy, Arkansas punk pop band has already gone through the motions and released a couple of EPs and LPs for various labels. This record, Undead in NYC, is their first live record, and its being released on Dim Mak. You can always count on live records to either be awesome, or really stink. This album tends to go the latter route. This recording is of a performance at the Knitting Factory in New York City in September 2002. In between bites of her chili cheeseburger, lead singer Beth Ditto, belts out the occasional song. The songs drone on for around two minutes a pop, and then they end. The audience cheers and I groan. If you listen carefully, you may be able to hear the stage creak. The Gossip isn't necessarily bad, but they aren't good, either. And they for sure aren't interesting. The Gossip says their mission statement as a band is to, "Make people dance." And their songs try to follow along those lines. Boring, formulaic song after boring, formulaic song, The Gossip attempts to put their listeners to sleep (possibly so they can steal their food).

We all know that The Gossip is fat, but what do they sound like? Well, they actually kind of sound like fat. If you kept lead singer Karen O from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and forced fed her Krispy Kreme donuts for about six months, and then gave her a really bad band, they would sound like The Gossip. The music is almost bluesy, almost punk, and almost poppy, but The Gossip pulls off none of these things. They just stink.

Undead in NYC clocks in at around the thirty minute mark. Which makes me happy. If it went over thirty minutes, I might get really pissed off, but it doesn't, so it only slightly bothers me that this CD exists.

2.1 / 10Will
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2.1 / 10

2.1 / 10

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