xDeathstarx

Maybe I am the only one that can see the irony in a Christian straightedge band having a song called "The Great Opiate" since organized religion has always been thought of the opiate of the masses for free thinking atheists around the world. Then again, I don't think xDeathstarx could bang two brain cells in their collective seven heads to come with something that ironic on their own. Boy Howdy! There are seven people in this band and only four of them play instruments, leaving the other three to handle the vocals. But it's not like anyone could tell seeing as Eric Gregson, Jason Kelly, and Ryan Bermuda all use the exact same Jamey Jasta bark interchangeably. It is redundancy in its finest form. Maybe xDeathstarx had a hard time saying no to people that wanted to join their band. Oh how the irony just keeps coming and coming.

Besides having three dudes that could probably kick my ass collectively, as well as individually, boasting lyrics that blur the line between blind devotion and militancy, xDeathstarx is nothing more than a nü-metal band with their downtuned guitars that squeal and pummel their way through monotonous drumming that recalls early Slipknot rather than anything else remotely hardcore. xDeathstarx do add some extra zest by using some Maiden-esque riffing. And they wouldn't be a favorite band of the camouflaged mosh-cap sect if they didn't have mosh parts. Boy howdy, do they ever have mosh parts. We are the Threat is so moshy that every song on this album seems to be written around a chance for people to annihilate each other in the pit.

What really throws me for a loop is that there are actually some gang vocals where the individuals sing instead of the usual call back response of whatever the vocalist just said. This oddly works in xDeathstarx's favor as it sets them apart from other boneheaded kill-people straightedge metalcore that is plaguing decent straightedge hardcore as of late. The choir-like singing doesn't make me anymore fond of xDeathstarx but at least when I hear it; I know it's them and not the new Throwdown album or something as equally horrible.

xDeathstarx and their ilk that believe that straightedge is a violent movement instead of a positive one are giving drug free youths out there a black eye both figuratively and as well as literally. Fans of xDeathstarx would like nothing more than to spend their day in the pit spinkicking their way into audiences and flexing their pipes to generic metal that often crosses the line into nü-metal. I guess it all makes sense because most of these blowhard "straightedge as fuck" kids were wearing super-sized big bondage pants at the food court last week.

The last thing I need is some seven piece camo-clad meatheads telling me about how bad drugs are and how Jesus saves under the guise of floor devastating mosh and nü-metal riffage. I think I'm only giving We are the Threat a 3 out of 10 because of just how ridiculously tasteless it is. I mean if I was a sixteen-year-old in the 'burbs that was mad at the world and Korn isn't cutting it anymore, I would probably be into xDeathstarx too. Luckily I'm not a sixteen-year-old mad at the world. Moreover, I'm happy I'm not a sheep that needs to be herded in by thick skulled belligerent jocks telling me to be free but also accept the Lord Almighty. Hey xDeathstarx, thanks for ruining hardcore.

3.0 / 10 — Jason