Royale With Cheese!
Brie De Meaux, Pyrénées Sheep Fromage, Comté, Bleu d'Auvergne, Époisses de Bourgogne, Le Chevrot. So much French Cheese and so little time. Nothing like a fine aged cheese that has the aroma of a baby’s shit-filled diaper accented with the smell of unwashed construction worker's feet and top offed with the ripe order of a hippie full-flavored onion soaked dreadlocked hairy armpit. Voila! That's Amore! Well, all you cheese connoisseurs out there that want to outrank the rank take note. There is a new kid on the block of cheese. This pudgy street urchin with a black eye, missing front tooth, Gitane dangling precariously from a burnt lip is ready to go bare-knuckle fisticuff toe to toe street tango...It’s a dance-off! Can you do the watusi, the mashed potato, the washing machine, the swim? Well, that is one foot in the right direction Listen! little John Travolta and listen hard. This is a new dance and it goes like this. You take your left arm and force it backward while propelling your front arm forwards. This will be done while jumping in the air and doing your best Pete Townsend impersonation and thrusting your head backward and screaming Double Cheese on every fourth beat in a measure.
Sounds easy. … well it isn't. This is the hip new sound hailing from Rochelle, France. Have you ever dug the Brian Wilson much loved platter- “How to Speak Hip”? Well, this is how much like that but with the new dance moves and the ability to speak Double Cheese lingo you will be the most popular kid in your Parisian district. Much like the well-regarded oversized wall clocks that hung from your neck in the middle to late 80s rap scene, well, now you can hang your favorite block of cheese from your neck. Being the ever-loving cheese connoisseur I would suggest some of Frances's well-regarded cheeses I outlined above but for you Americans, you might want to go for a block of Monterey Jack. Canadian Cheddar would be the obvious common safe choice for all Canucks….
Farfisa-driven creepy-handed Munsters pumping organ grinding rhythm. Sounding much like the kid cousin of Lost Sounds on 1620 Echles Street with a touch of Jeff Conolly's “Don’t Give It Up Now” Lyres drenched in the Double Cheese mind-melting double-dipping saliva viral-induced 70’s fondue party... Dip in, twist that fork…and treat yourself to a new take on old cheese. Feel the fuzz. feel it real good....
8 wedges of brie out of 10
