Reviews Various Artists Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theatres

Various Artists

Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theatres

I'm going to be quite blunt right off the bat. Normally I would take the time to write some kind of intro that ties in with the album that I'm reviewing. But I'm not going to waste my time or yours because of two reasons. First off, you already know what Aqua Teen Hunger Force is about and secondly; this soundtrack just isn't worth it.

The soundtrack opens with Master Shake singing along to a softly strummed guitar on a song titled "Nude Love." The humor of the lyrics are very much in line with the style of humor of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, but this time lacking in any humor. Following is a commercial, which was probably used in the movie prior to it officially beginning; it is another waste of a track.

Mastodon is the first band to first to serve up original material. Their song "Cut You Up With a Linoleum Knife" is musically in line with the rest of their catalog: fierce metal that makes you want to headbang. However, the band have gone off the deep-end (most likely as a joke) and changed their vocal stylings to sound very cartoonish. Even then, it's still a good song. Early Man follows this up with "More to Me than Meat and Eyes." I never really followed this band; I've only heard their name in passing. But this song is nothing but stale rock riffs and stupid lyrics. So it would appear I have not been missing out.

Schooly D delivers a remix of the Aqua Teen Hunger Force theme song; they've fused fuzzed-out guitars and beats in a Run DMC meet Aerosmith sound to rhymed verses. Do you like skits? Well I don't, but this is the first one and it's an intro by Meatwad for the next song on the soundtrack. Unearth hits the listener with "The Chosen" and its like listening to everything else that is popular in the "hardcore scene" these days. They fuse metalcore riffs with a "southern-rock" influence. There are about a thousand bands doing this now and I'm sick of hearing them all. Hopefully this fad passes soon. Up next is Andrew W.K. with his track "Party Party Party." I am an avid W.K. fan, but this is pretty much a complete waste as the song sounds like a recycled version of "Party Hard" without the great sing-along lyrics. This is followed by more skits... who cares?

9 Lb. Hammer deliver a song titled "Carl's Theme," which is a punk rock dedication to the character; it's kind of funny. Brass Castle follow with "Bookworm Resin," which sounds like a group of twelve year olds covering Queens of the Stone Age but with horrible vocals and no instrumental skills whatsoever. Guess what? More skits!!!!! At least this one hints at the fact that, yes, this soundtrack is in fact a joke to just get your money. Thank God I got this for free or I'd be pissed.

Killer Mike follows with "Blam Blam," a reggae-meets-rap song that made me remember Afroman; I hate them for that. This is followed by Insane-O-Flex's "I Like Your Booty (But I'm Not Gay)." This is essentially a dance-track for those trendy bars that I wouldn't be caught dead in, but with stupid female vocals stating the song-title over and over. I really am starting to wonder who footed the money for this soundtrack to be released.

"I Want Candy" isn't a cover of The Strangeloves' classic, so don't even bother. "Girls Like Status" by The Hold Steady is easily the second best track on this tribute. They wrote a rock tune that, though it isn't anything super-exciting, I could enjoy. "Nude Love (Reprise)" - do I even need to comment? There are some hidden tracks: Superchunk playing music while Meatwad sings vocals, what sounds like Mastodon with someone singing hella 80's metal vocals, and then some Eddie Van Halen styled guitar solos. Again, do I even need to comment on this?

Soundtracks aren't normally the greatest source of music material, but this soundtrack is a disgrace. I can't believe they wasted the money to package and sell this album. If you bought this, I feel sorry for you.

0.5 / 10Michael
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