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Regular Columns / Running on Nothing: There's a Glitch in the Matrix

Feature — November 30, 2021

A handful of years ago, my friend Jay sent me the demo of his new band. Jay had spent years fronting the legendary Detroit punk/ska band, The Suicide Machines. A few years had passed since they released War Profiteering and broke up. Jay was fronting a new band now. …

Regular Columns / Running on Nothing: I went on tour for 2 days and all I got was a panic attack (and sand in my butt)

Feature — September 19, 2021

I've been the main merch guy for Mustard Plug for the past 10 years. My schedule is pretty loose, so it allows me to do tours with them. I love the job. It's a lot of fun meeting new people, traveling to various states, and hanging out with my buds …

Regular Columns / Running on Nothing: Get In The Van Dummy, We're Going Surfing!

Feature — June 7, 2021

I was in a band called The Lippies. I say "was" because we just broke up. Again. Hahahahaha! When we formed, we never had any intention of truly being anything more than a local or regional band. Then we caught the attention of Toby from Red Scare Industries and things …

Regular Columns / Running on Nothing: It's Only Illegal if You Get Caught

Feature — April 18, 2021

About a year ago, we found ourselves in the middle of a worldwide pandemic. Out of boredom, I did a livestream on my social media where I did a joke tutorial about how to draw penises. It was a joke that backfired on me. I ended up making a few …