Chris Farren (Fake Problems)
SPB: What makes a good host when you sleep on a stranger’s floor?
Farren: I'll preface this by saying anyone who asks or lets a band stay at their house is a very kind and gracious soul, and we appreciate it immensely. We've been saved numerous times from costly hotel rooms and Walmart parking lots.
That said, there are a few things I ask about when looking for the ideal place to stay. For me, first and foremost is, "Are you having a party?" A lot of people are really excited to have a band stay over, and they want so desperately to show them a good time. This is great! But after a show, around 1am, most of us just want to sleep. I can't even count how many times I've been laying in a sleeping bag in the middle of someone's dining room as eight dudes stand over me drunkenly having the same conversation about the ethics of "selling out." This leads to me never sleeping that night and inevitably getting crazy sick for a week.
Next up is general comfort: how many couches/beds/carpeted floor space is there? Hardwood floors are very beautiful but they are also very painful to sleep on.
Last but not least is wifi, baby. I'm sorry but I am basically at your house to ignore everything around me and find a few moments of peace within months of spending 100% of my time with other people.
Oh, one more thing: the place you want to take us for breakfast that is 10 minutes away? It's 45 minutes away and we are going to be late for our show now.